Nursery.

I finally finished the nursery!! It's nothing spectacular, but it took me forever since I've been so lazy. But I'm happy to say that it's finally done. There are a few bits & bobs that I'll add over time (ex: different lamp, something for bows, & a wreath or something with her initial once she has a name), but beyond that I'm really really proud of it. Especially since I had a specific colour pallet & patterns that I wanted to go with & I couldn't paint the walls. There are ten pictures.

View from doorway.

The crib (from my parents). There's also a small rocking horse to the left.

Pink thing over crib: 50% off @ Hobby Lobby
 chevron quilt: Gabe's cousin Rachel

Close up of the mobile I made.

Frames: 50% off @ Hobby Lobby
Storage for:
stuffed animals (yes, that's a stuffed airplane),
receiving blankets,
wipes (diapers are in the closet),
toys & books.

I'm in love with this quote.

My corner.
(Ignore the incredibly classy sheet chair cover.)
Angry bird was from dad last year. He thought it was going to be small. It matches.
Boppy: Walmart
chevron pillow: Target
quilt over chair: my Aunt Lynn

Mirror :$7 @ Target
I decorated it. Originally just a black frame

Dresser: $25 off Craigslist (Gabe redid it.)
Changing pad & cover: Target
Pink basket for diapers: Hobby Lobby
Temporary lamp: Ikea
Shelves: $14 each? Ikea

Some wonderful books!
Frames: 50% off @ Hobby Lobby

 K that's everything! I really enjoyed getting everything together. I even enjoyed folding all the crib sheets & blankets & putting them in the little linen closet in her room. & the little baby clothes! So cute. Everything is stashed away where it belongs. It took a long time, especially to figure out how I should organize everything, but I'm really happy with how everything turned out. I know it's nothing spectacular. It's not like we have a gazillion dollars. I wish. That would be fun. Every time I go upstairs I have to look in the room to make sure everything is still in place just waiting for baby girl to get here. As my sister said yesterday, you would think that with such a cute nursery she'd wanna get out & see it for herself!! Soon. Patience is a virtue that I really struggle with.

Anyway. That is all.

- Alexa

38 weeks.

38 weeks.

My due date is in TWO WEEKS!!! I hope I don't make it that far though, as horrible as that sounds. I'm hoping with every fiber of my being that I go in to labor this week. That would greatly upset my mom since she doesn't get here until the day after Thanksgiving (aka next Friday). She's demanded that I keep the baby in until she gets here, but my desire to get her out outweighs my desire to have my mom here for the birth. Never thought I'd say that. Ha! (Love you mom.) I really don't think I'll go in to labor this week. It's just wishful thinking. I'm pretty sure I'm in it for the long haul. Hopefully she comes soon. I mean, obviously 2 weeks is soon, but it feels like a lifetime. I'm so far passed the point of being ready to get her out. I'm not even afraid of labor now cause I'm so anxious. I'm sure once I actually go in to labor that I'll be tons more terrified. As will Gabe. Speaking of going in to labor, I'm actually nervous about one thing! The main thing they tell you to look for is contractions 5-7 minutes apart for an hour. Uh... I get those ALL the time. & they get worse over time. They last for hours. If I went by that I'd be calling pretty much every day. I'm terrified I won't call. I'm hoping my water breaks (even though I've read that only happens to something like 15% of women) & it's super obvious. That's a pretty clear cut sign that I need to go in. That's what I'm hoping for.

Every time I leave the house I feel like I'm being watched by everyone that sees me. Particularly if they know how far along I am. People look at me as though I shouldn't be up & around at this point. I was in Verizon the other day & the person asked me how far I am, then he kept asking if I was okay the entire time I was there. HELLO! I'm clearly not going in to labor. I'm just waddling. I'm fine. I've also heard a BAJILLION times this week that I don't look 38 weeks pregnant. That it's not fair that I don't look pregnant from the front from far away, or at all from the back. I'm pretty sure someone related me to a tooth pick at some point. I must take after my mom, cause I remember her saying she was an "olive on a toothpick" when she was pregnant. I suppose I'm blessed!

I have a sister-in-law who's due date was today. Yes, two weeks apart & each with our first baby. These cousins will be very very close in age. She had her baby girl on Wednesday! She's very cute. Ariel had the 6th baby in my family born this year (5 of those being Staples, & all baby girls), which means I'm next!!!! It's finally my turn. YAY! I keep on telling baby girl it's time & that it's her turn, but she's just so cozy in my womb I suppose. That should make me feel good, to know that I'm providing a safe warm home for my child. But really it just makes me feel like a host to an alien. Get out baby! & I mean that with love.

Yesterday I basically finished the nursery. I listened to Christmas music (because I can start up the Christmas spirit before Thanksgiving if I want) & spent hours in there folding, hanging, organizing...you name it. There are still things that I will add over time, but I think it's really cute & I'm really proud of it. I have a few finishing touches to put on it today & then I will post a separate post about the nursery. But for now, that's a little preview at the left! The colours for the room are pink & turquoise. I tried to stay in that realm as much as possible. I made a few things for the room myself actually. I'm pretty proud of myself for being so incredibly crafty.

This week was also the week my phone's life ended. I guess the fact that it lasted through 8 & a half months of my pregnancy is pretty impressive. I lost it all the time. I dropped it a lot. I found it in the freezer once. & the final straw was the puddle at Hobby Lobby. It was barely a puddle. It was just a teeny bit of water in a crack in the pavement. I didn't even remember it cause my phone fell with the cover down & water only got on the back. I guess some splashed in to it though & it started freaking out a few hours later. So I got a new phone. The Galaxy S3. It was a hard decision between that & the iphone 5, but I made it & I'm really happy with it. It's a cool phone. But I'm scared of it because it doesn't have a case yet. It's so thin. Pretty sure my chubby pregnant hands are gonna crush it.

Also, I want to leave you with this little gem. Most people don't have the privilege of seeing this side of my husband. Luckily I do on a daily basis. He's an outrageously smart engineer type, but man is he a weirdo! I just love him. =]

K. I have nothing more to say, other than to hope & pray that this baby decides it's moving day this week. =]

That is all.

- Alexa

37 weeks.

37 weeks.

TERM!!!! 3 weeks until my actual due date (aka full term), but I am at term! That means that she would no longer be considered a pre-term baby if she was born now. Which means I am more than ready to evict her cute little toosh. I am well aware that she'll come when she's ready & not a second sooner, but I like to think I'm helping things along by walking, eating spicy foods....you know, the things that "induce labor." Makes me feel like I'm helping. Last week I was looking forward to having her by November 26th, but my doctor said that he won't decide yes or no on inducing me at 39 weeks until my 38 week appointment. He has to see if things have progressed at all. I was hoping with all these contractions they would...but nope! So hopefully by 38 weeks SOMETHING will have changed so they can give me a light at the end of the tunnel. Honestly I'm really hoping she'll come sooner. I'm so ready to get her out. People always ask me if I'm ready to have a baby. Absolutely not! I'm terrified. I am in no way ready to have a baby. But I am more than ready to get her out of me. Don't get me wrong, I love my baby, & it's really cool to feel her in there. But she's getting a wee bit big, & my uterus is not large enough to accommodate some of these moves she's trying to pull off. Strangely enough, I don't love being punched in the cervix (sorry) & kicked in the ribs at the same time. It's just not comfortable. & don't tell me I'll regret saying this, or I'll have a tougher time with a newborn. I'm well aware. But the grass is always greener on the other side. I just want to be able to bend over & get the socks out of the dryer when they're shoved to the back. & I want people to look at my face when I'm walking around instead of my belly. It's the simple things in life!

Okay, anyway. I'm doing fine. My weight gain has stalled & I've maxed out at 24lbs. It'll probably stay that way. Or at least I'm hoping so. It's not abnormal to stop gaining weight or to lose in the last month. Sounds good to me! Besides, 24lbs is actually under the recommended 25-35lbs! So I feel pretty dang good about myself! I still have a nasty cold, but I feel like that won't go away for a while. I can't take anything & I don't sleep, so my body is definitely in no place to kick any grossness out. I'm still having contractions. I've been having them for 3-7 hour spurts everyday this week. They're about 5 minutes apart & they hurt a bit. Every time I hope it's actually going to turn in to something but it never does. I'm hoping & praying that they turn in to something soon. On Thursday during one of those spurts, I was so pathetic that I couldn't bend down at the commissary to get a jar of pumpkin off the bottom shelf. Someone had to get it for me. & then people let me cut them in line. I'm going to miss that kind of treatment. My doctor has also told me not to drive anymore because of the passing out thing. He mentioned that it sounds like little seizures. I think that's a little dramatic, as is telling me not to drive...so I drive anyway. Gabe won't let me drive far though.

People that Gabe works with threw us a little baby shower on Tuesday. It was very nice of them. Mostly because there was chocolate cake. I love chocolate cake. Mmm chocolate. We got a very nice diaper cake (which doesn't sound delicious at all). It looks so pretty I don't want to take it apart. But I will be needing those diapers, & there are little toys & burp cloths on it that I need to go through, so I guess I have to take it apart eventually. It was nice of them to get gifts for us. & the cake. That was nice as well.

There's still a lot to get done. I need to clean the rest of my house, but it's really hard to get down on my hands & knees & scrub at this point. Mostly I just want to get the baby's room done. That's my goal for this weekend. I want to walk in to that room & see that everything is in place. People keep telling me I can do it after I have her, but I'd rather it be out of the way & not have to worry about it later. Plus, I'm pretty sure if I waited, it would never get done. Besides, it isn't like I have a TON to do. I just need to organize the drawers a bit better, hang some picture frames & the mobile I made, & figure out where to store anything extra. It's really not a big job. I just need to have the energy to do it. I should've done it yesterday. I had loads of energy, but I spent all of it going to Target, Pier 1, & Hobby Lobby looking at Christmas decorations. I feel like that's a justifiable trade-off. =]

To sum up. I'm term. I want the baby to be born asap. I'm sleepy. Contractions & no labor. I have a lot to get done. & I love Christmas! (Really, the last one is the most important. Other than the baby being born asap. That's really important, too.)

That is all.

- Alexa

36 weeks.

36 weeks.

Four weeks until my due date. One week until I'm considered full term. & three weeks until they'll induce me. Baby girl Staples will likely be here the last week of November unless I go in to labor sooner...which I really hope I do. The doctor I spoke to this week said they would induce me on the 26th. But I'm going to see my regular doctor this week because the likelihood of that labor turning in to an emergency c-section is probably pretty high. I really don't want an emergency c-section so we're going to talk to him about that this week. I'm really hoping baby girl gets here sooner though. I am fully aware that having a newborn is going to be hard & I'll probably be pretty miserable. But I'm already pretty miserable, so I think not having a baby in my belly would be nice so that I could at least roll over. Plus, I'm having issues with my blood pressure again, so I'd like that to go away. I passed out a lot today from simple tasks like showering, & putting the bumper on the crib. I'd just like that to be over. So... baby get out of me!!!! Having said that, I think it's so cool feeling her move around in there. It took a lot of getting used to but I finally enjoy it. I particularly love it when she gets the hiccups. Husband thinks it's funny that her hiccups make my whole belly bounce. She gets them 6 or 7 times a day. She's very hiccupy. (As you can see in the above photo, baby has dropped.)

In other news this week, I'm dealing with a cold. It very rapidly went from my throat to my chest. That's no fun. Especially when I'm this big. But at least I have a voice for 95% of the day now! I just have a bit of a nasty cough. Hurricane/superstorm Sandy hit this week. Seeing pictures of New York & New Jersey is so sad. We had 50mph gusts & we're all the way out in southwest Ohio. I cannot imagine the damage in closer areas. We got a lot of rain for 3 days straight...which I loved. Reminded me of home. Cause you know, I consider England home & it rains 300 something days of the year there. I love the overcast rainy weather. It brings me joy. Oh! I also finished the mobile for the baby's room last Sunday. I'll have to get a good picture of it once we hang it. I'm pretty proud of it!

K, things are about to get serious. I don't mean to sound preachy or anything...but this has been on my mind for a long time & it really bothers me.

I realized a long time ago that people tend not to talk about their pregnancies openly. Most people just act like everything is perfect & they love being pregnant. Even Gabe told me that he didn't realize that pregnancy was so hard because he's only ever heard women say wonderful things about pregnancy. You rarely hear about the negatives from people. It makes other women feel awful for ever having doubts or issues. That's why I prefer to be open. If someone who's pregnant reads what I've experienced they'll know they're not the only one & not feel so bad about it! I've had plenty of doubts, fears, & issues over the last 34 weeks that I've known I was pregnant. Tons in fact. I don't feel like that's abnormal in the least. But people never talk about it so at first I felt awful.

This week it really hit me that people need to be able to talk about the realities of pregnancy. It's hard! There are always people that will have it harder, but you know what? You're not pathetic for thinking your pregnancy is hard, cause it's hard on you. & no one else knows what's going on with you except for YOU! My pregnancy has not been easy for me. I've had plenty of issues, but I'm blessed because as far as they can tell, my baby is perfectly healthy. & I'm going to be perfectly fine once baby gets here as far as we know! I love knowing that I'm growing a healthy baby girl. That doesn't mean that I've had it easy. I've been in & out of labor & delivery plenty of times. I've passed out way more than is good for anyone. My blood pressure is all over the place. I still get morning sickness. Among other things. You know what? It sucks! It could definitely be worse, but that doesn't make me think my pregnancy doesn't suck any less. Occasionally I like being pregnant, but for the most part, I really don't like it. I'm uncomfortable all the time. A few weeks ago I started this thing where I don't sleep any more than 30 minutes at a time, if that. I look pretty drugged thanks to the lack of sleep (& people notice...including strangers). I already have back problems, but my back has never hurt so bad. Yes, those last few are totally normal for pregnancy...but they are still bothersome, & I still feel like it's okay to complain about it. I've had a tough 8 months & I'm ready for baby girl to get here. Not just because I want to meet her, but because I really want my body back. I feel like I'm a host for an alien or something. That probably sounds terrible. It doesn't mean I don't love my baby, it just means I don't love being pregnant. I find that to be perfectly okay.

I hope that people try to keep in mind that it's okay to have insecurities & doubts when they're pregnant. That it's okay if you're having a tough time because you're throwing up, even though that other woman may have it worse because she's on full bed rest. That doesn't mean you're weak. Keep in mind that you're growing a human. It's not easy!! Whether you have no kids or six kids, it's draining. I admire women who have multiple kids & deal with being pregnant. I can't imagine doing that. I know I will someday, but the idea of it terrifies me. I don't even have energy to play with my dog. How could I possibly have energy for kids, a dog, & taking care of the husband & house? I guess I'll find out someday. But in the meantime I'm dealing with THIS pregnancy. This is the first baby we're bringing in to the world & it has been a long road. My long road isn't over yet. But in the next 3 weeks it'll all be worth it when we bring a beautiful, healthy, baby girl in to the world. Yes, she'll keep me up all the time, but at least she'll be out of me & I can love her & squeeze her! Right now I just cradle my watermelon belly. & when I put pressure on my belly she usually freaks out & ends up kicking me really hard in the hip so that doesn't happen very often. Anyway. The point is, don't make people feel bad about having a hard time when they're pregnant, even if you went through worse. Make sure they know it's okay to feel miserable. Especially with their first. This is the last time they get to pity themselves cause once that baby is born they have to suck it up & be a mom. (& for the record, if a mom-to-be is depressed, I don't think that's called self pity. Depression is a big deal & it can get a lot worse with post partum...& even before then given all those hormones.) I sulk around my house all the time, but I know that soon I'll have to put on my big girl pants & be a mom. In the meantime I'm perfectly content curling up in fetal position, hunched over on the floor, or propping my feet up. A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do.

Okay. Seriousness is over. I hope everyone is well!

That is all.

- Alexa